Caring for Others

In case you don't know, I have begun taking classes in order to obtain a teaching degree.  One of the classes is Public Speaking.  Our final speech is a Persuasive speech.  The topic I chose is "Caring for Others".  I thought you might be interested.  Please, leave a comment and let me know what you think.

Update July 2021 -- I have taken my speech notes and expanded on it for an English paper.  If you don't want to watch the speech, here's the paper:

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It Takes a Village….

They say it takes a village to raise a child … I say it also takes a village to care for a sick person.  You will not be able to tell by my appearance, but I have Stage 4 cancer.  I was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer just over six years ago.  Since then, I have been on continuous treatment.  Especially while I was undergoing chemotherapy, but still, even now six years later, I have been approached by so many people wanting to help … but most do not know how.  They do not know what they can do to ease my suffering.  “Let me know what you need” is very nice, but we (sick people) usually cannot at that moment think of something specific.  We all come in contact, every day, with people who might be going through a hard time.  I have spent the past six years living with a terminal illness, so I believe I can shed some light on what we can do for our family member, our friend, our neighbor, even the stranger at the grocery store.  I believe that it is vitally important that we help others when we can.

What do I mean by caring for others?  In this instance, specifically helping people in a time of need.  Why do we need to care for others?  Everyone has been through something in their lives.  Everyone has needed help in one way or another. Everyone knows what it feels like to need help.

Merriam-Webster defines caring as “feeling or showing concern for or kindness to others”.  While I was undergoing chemotherapy, I needed help.  I needed help with grocery shopping, with preparing meals, with rides to medical appointments, with simply walking. Even now, six years later, I still need help – I need help still with grocery shopping, with preparing meals, with rides to medical appointments.  What is different now is that my husband also is in need.  He has Parkinson’s Disease, so we both need help with daily living.

I believe that we need to care for other for many reasons.  Everyone has been through something in their lives.  Everyone has needed help in one way or another. Everyone knows what it feels like to need help.  It is a wonderful thing to give back/pay it forward.  After my diagnosis, I found out that so many of my friends, co-workers, and even acquaintances had something stressful going on in their lives.   A friend related to me that she was currently taking chemo-type medication for her arthritis.  Another friend has a special needs adult child.  A few co-workers related their cancer stories to me.  My point here is this – most everyone we know has something going on in their lives.  Some we do not know about, some we do, but I believe that everybody has something.

It feels good to do for others.  It is good for our own mental health to be able to do for others.   According to an article in Current Directions in Psychological Science, it is thought that providing support to other people, when it is a choice and when it is perceived to be effective, “can also be beneficial, leading to reduced stress, increased happiness, and increased sense of social connectedness.”  (Inagaki and Orehek 2017)

There are so many things we can do to help others in need.  We can provide meals, gift cards to grocery stores, gas stations, and restaurants.  We can send a “thinking of you” card, we can give rides to medical appointments, we can be available for phone calls.  We can help with grocery shopping, we can send a care package with comforting items. The list can go on and on.  

            The most important thing I can say is this:  Do not ask, just do.  Send a gift card.  Show up with dinner – if they have two show up one night, one goes in the fridge for the next night.  Send gift cards for gas stations.  Send comfort items. 

We may not be able to see that someone is going through a hard time.  Not everyone who is sick actually looks sick.  Let us assume that everyone we come in contact with has some sort of stress in their lives and treat everyone kindly, and be as helpful as possible.  Hold the door; hold the elevator; be patient with each other.  Be kind … always.

 

References:

“Caring.” Merriam-Webster, Merriam-Webster, www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/caring.

Inagaki, Tristen K., and Edward Orehek. “On the Benefits of Giving Social Support: When, Why, and How Support Providers Gain by Caring for Others - Tristen K. Inagaki, Edward Orehek, 2017.” Current Directions in Psychological Science, 6 Apr. 2017, journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/0963721416686212.