Monday, February 22, 2016

Why I Gave Away My Yarn

It's a good thing. Really. 

I'd been thinking about it for awhile. In a few knitting facebook groups, people periodically post photos of their stashes (of yarn). Most of the comments on these photos are those of us with smaller stashes being envious. To have all of that yarn at your disposal, whenever a whim strikes -- wow. Sometimes it spurs a discussion -- to have a stash vs. buying for a specific project and actually using the yarn before buying more. I've always gone back and forth on this. Sometimes I would love a roomful of yarn. Sometimes I think, no matter how long I live, I would never use that much.

With my Stage IV cancer diagnosis, I realize that I am not my lifetime going to use up all of the yarn I had already accumulated. Not that I was buying yarn whilly-nilly. Each skein of yarn was intended for a specific project. Some of the yarn was for shawls I had printed out patterns for. Some of the yarn had actually started to become some of these shawls. There were quite a few of partial skeins; yarn left after completing a project. These partial skeins were meant to be a Ten Stitch Blanket (I've linked the pattern if you're interested). Some of the yarn was intended for craft fair knitting. For the past few years, I had a table a few craft fairs in the Fall. I sold baby blankets, shawls, cowls, coffee cup cozies. My intention this year was to add boot cuffs, wash cloths, and coasters to my craft fair tables. Chemo had other plans. I spent last summer going through, and dealing with the side effects of, chemo. I was too tired and too sick to knit much. So, nothing new on the craft fair tables. I actually had a table at two craft fairs this past Fall; I had signed up for them before I knew I would have surgery. It was to much. It's now late February, and I'm still exhausted. I definitely don't knit as much as I used to. Mostly I rest now. When I do have energy, I try to get some household chores done, or play with the dog, spend time with my boys, or maybe have a date day (way too tired for date night), but I digress....

Don't think I'm being morbid for giving away the yarn. Don't think it means I think I'm going to die any time soon. All of my doctors tell me I have a lot of years left. :) What the Stage IV diagnosis has done is make me stop and realize: We're all going to die. Cancer may or may not kill me. [Please don't tell me I may get hit by the proverbial bus. I'd rather take my chances with the bus.] Something will, however. It's going to happen. Watching that proverbial bus coming, though, and realizing that someday it will come, makes you stop and think. Again, I digress....

I sorted the yarn. I kept some that I still intend to use. I threw away some tangled messes. I gave away three white trash bags full of yarn that I realized that I would never use. I've decided to not do any more craft fair knitting. The yarn that I gave away will be put to good use at my friend's church.  So, to make a long story short -- I did not give all of my yarn away. I did not give my yarn away because my death is imminent. It's not ... at least as far as I know. ;) Heck, I didn't even give all of my yarn away. You'll see pictures of shawls in the future, and a few baby blankets to boot. Maybe even a doggie sweater for Benji. :)

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